My Milkshake Brings All The Boys To The Yard - whatever that means!!!

On Saturday, I got the opportunity to actually have a talk with my fantastic 13 year old stepdaughter. It wasn’t about how her dad smells or what movie star she has a crush on. No, it was an actual conversation in which I thought I actually made some kind of impact in her life.

Out of the blue she mentioned Jamie Lynn Spears being pregnant. So for the next 30 minutes we talked about it. I told her that I don’t think a 16 year old has the first inkling as to what is in store for her. Why would a young girl with a great future ahead of her have a baby now? Oni had some very good questions and comments. I am so very proud of her for having more of a brain in her head than some of the other teens out there. She said that she didn’t want to have a baby. She is scared of the pain. That is what most people looking towards motherhood see…the pain. I let her know that although the pain is basically enough to rip you apart, that isn’t what is the hard part. It is times like this conversation that are hard. It is no sleep and baking cookies until 1 am and not knowing where your kids are. That is rough. I told her that I was not so much upset that this 16 year old is having a baby, but the lack of responsibility. It is 2007, ya know? Does she not know that she can take a pill to prevent pregnancy? What the Hell was she doing not using a condom? Who does she think she is? Well, obviously like most teens, she thinks she is invincible…until about 12 weeks ago!

My conversation with Areyani turned to birth control when she asked “isn’t there like a vitamin you can take so that you don’t get pregnant?” Again, she’s 13 folks. I told her about the pill, that you take it everyday and it can help regulate your period and all the side effects that I experienced with it. I also told her that when she is old enough, I would have no problem taking her to get on the pill. I want her to be responsible. I want her to take her future into her own hands. I told her that when she thinks she’s ready for sex…that she should wait at least 2 more years. I am realistic, people. I know that I was too young when I had sex for the first time. I know that I cannot expect my children to wait until they are ready, because I am not sure we are ever “ready”. I will allow them to protect themselves and others and treat them with the respect that they deserve. However, I will not be taking her to the clinic ANYTIME SOON….like 4 or 5 years from now is good for me. I will schedule it.

So, to all those parents out there who are dealing with these issues. Talk to your kids. Tell them how it felt your first time. BE HONEST. Tell them what they need to know to protect themselves and maybe, just maybe you will learn a little something, too.

Mirth & Merriment…..and many, MANY CONDOMS!